Stop Those Self-defeating Thoughts

I awoke this morning feeling less than confident and filled with many voices. There were many thoughts swimming around my head as if in a race. The thoughts were not caring, supportive, or loving. They were self-defeating. They were the ramblings of a mind telling me why I should not, could not, can’t, not good enough, I am a failure and it went on and on. I kept taking deep breaths searching for the present moment, searching for my divinity that says I can do anything, and I am everything. I was quickly reminded why my teachers and guides have been instructing me to stop thinking. These thoughts were making me feel awful. I did not want to get out of bed and face the world. However, today was an important day. I had been anticipating it for the past few days. Today I have the opportunity to step on the path of a second chance at a dream that I had many years ago. Today I had a job interview. This was no way for me to proceed successfully. I had to silent the voices and thoughts moving around my head. These voices were going to be my doom, and stop my creation of landing this job, before I even had the opportunity. Luckily, I knew just what to do. I was able to observe thoughts without engaging with and stepping towards them. I knew that they were not who I am at all. They were completely self-loathing, and there was a peeling away of whom I am not happening. Many times these thoughts will appear as they are being released from our energy especially as we awake from the dream state. Our subconscious and spirits do a lot of work on the ethereal plane at night as we sleep. However, as we move back into the body as we awake, those things that we did not release while sleeping, sometimes take a hold of us and we awake feeling awful. They can disorient us, and make us not feel safe. There are a few tools that you can use to stop these thoughts:

1. Be the observer. Notice that you are not these thoughts. This will help you create a separation from your thoughts and shift back into who you are.

2. As you observe notice how these thoughts are making you feel, and shift your emotions to something that feels good such as a great sense of well-being.

3. Put a smile on your face and breathe. Your breath becomes stagnant while you sleep. Breathe new life into your body. Breathe in success, certainty, and well-being.

4. Sit in a meditative position, take a deep breath, follow your breath, see a rose out in front of you, and ask it to collect up doubt and failure out of your space.

(The breathing and rose techniques are available on my “Tools to Stay Present CD” http://www.donahspassions.com/meditationcd.html)

I was fortunate enough to remove those self-defeating thoughts from my head. I went to my interview excited, successful, capable, confident, and gracious. Looks like I will be getting my second chance. So far, the thoughts still have not creped back up. I am feeling great. Try out the exercises that I have offered you. Allow them to be playful. Remember, no thinking, notice the thoughts that rummage around. They are not who you are. You are so much more that you can ever imagine. Be the light you are meant to be.

The Feeling of Stuck

The feeling of being stuck for me is one of feeling like a caged animal. I become a large ferocious cat pacing back in forth in a cage waiting to explode. I hate the feeling of stuck. It makes me feel angry, and a little crazy. I can feel it in my whole body, straight down to my toes. When I have felt stuck, what comes with it is the overwhelming need to move. It is like wearing a suit that is too small. I cannot breath and, I feel restricted. I absolutely do not like limitations just as much as I do not like it when someone tells me that I cannot. You could say that I am even somewhat of a rebel. I do not like rules and regulations. Most of them make no sense. This feeling of stuck takes away my freedom, and my right to choose. Just like a big ferocious cat, I sit in my cage and wait quietly. I become really present, and observant of everything around me, and as soon as I see movement, I roar very loudly. My roar is so loud that the universe shakes and the stuck breaks a part. I wiggle, and slither to break free of the chains, and then I pounce. I use my frustration and anger as a catalyst for movement. I move my body. Gabrielle Roth says, “If you move the body the psyche will heal itself”. This has held true in my own life. The key is to find stillness in the movement. Moving within and watching the waves as they grow taller, and then shrink down. I have felt this feeling of stuck and watched others in this place. Some people allow it to beat them down and inertia sets in. Others run around in circles not realizing that the path they are on is leading back to the same beginning point. The commonality is that unless you allow change to float in and accept it like a lover you will stay in the dark. How do we embrace the change especially when it comes in like a tornado? I have sat back and evaluated my life over and over finding the places where the tornado blew through. We think that we can prepare for the tornado, but you really cannot. Life has a way of taking your preparations, throwing them out the window, and forcing you to create on the spot. I have reinvented myself so many times that I am surprised at myself. I never saw myself as the chameleon, but my loved ones would tell you differently. When my daughter Annika was born and I found out, she was ill. They rushed her off to a separate hospital from me. It took me days before I realized that the ground beneath my feet was shaking like an earthquake. The earth was sucking me in. I am one of those people that simply do what is needed and, necessary in the moment. It can be days before I realize the magnitude of what happened. With Annika, I think it took me years. It was not until I was no longer able to lift myself up that I realized the storm was forcing me into submission. It was not until I allowed myself to be cradled in the tornado that I began to regain my strength and find myself once again. Remember the ferocious cat? I have had no choice, but to learn what they know all too well. Cats know how to be patient and watch the tides and tornado's come in. My experiences have taught me how to sense them and flow with them instead of against them. There was a time that I fought them, how silly I was, and how painful it was. You cannot fight turbulent waters. They will take you over and consume you like fire, and you will drown. There is another way; it is called flowing. You take a deep breath and step right into the tornado, but you wait and observe like the cat looking for a place to plant your footing. At first, it feels as though you have no control, and you shake, you may scream and you may fall down. Then you get the hang of it, and the shaking becomes rocking, and you find your rhythm. The breath becomes calm and powerful. You begin to feel and hear the tide. You become one with it. Change happens and you realize that you are better for it. You look around you and the world looks different or have you become different. The ferocious cat becomes a kitten when it is set free, and you realize that you are the one that conjured up the storm. It was the only way for what you desired to appear. It was the only way to receive your gifts. It was the only way for you to connect to the deeper parts of the feminine within. This is the courageous Journey to a woman’s joyous life.

If you would like to learn how to step into the flow, please join and Denise Cooper me October 17th at 10:00 am where we will be sharing the secrets of finding a joyous life.

If you are ready to:
•Learn how your habits and sense of well-being are sabotaging your happiness.
•Learn how to say no, to what you do not want and say yes, to what you do want.
•Learn how to visualize what you want and let your vision inspire you every day.
•Learn how to relax flow in the middle of a storm.

Insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly, expecting different results.
Are You READY for something different?

Workshop Cost: $179.00 includes meals and materials
$75.00 for overnight lodging

Location: www.medissage.org

For more information please contact me at donah@donahspassions.com. To see Denise Cooper’s blog visit http://coachhr.wordpress.com/